Dare to Tri

I have a huge fear of failure, so much so that if I don't think I can succeed at something, I'm unlikely to even attempt it. I have never used a treadmill or weights at a gym because I have no idea how to use them and I'm afraid everyone will laugh at me. When swimming, I always get really self conscious because I LOOK like an athlete, but I'm still learning.

All of these things have held me back in the past, but not anymore.

I've got 90 days left until IronMan and my training has been sporadic at best, erratic at times, and non existent too often. At this point, a finish might not even be possible for me, but I've decided to try. The very real possibility of failing is not going to keep me from taking a shot at my dream of becoming an IronMan.

I'm just so damn proud that I even have the courage to embark on a journey like this. IronMan has always seemed unattainable to me, but here I am, training for it and making plans for this day in three months.

When I first started biking again in 2011, I went 2.5 miles, had to stop to catch my breath, and then went home. I can now bike 20 miles like it's nothing, 50 miles with ease, and 100+ miles proficiently.

When I first started running, I couldn't run half a mile without stopping to wheeze. I can run an entire 10K without stopping now.

When I first started triathlons, the farthest I'd ever swam (swum?) was to the end of the pool as a kid. I swam .25 miles in my first triathlon and I was amazed I was capable of doing that. 6 months later, and I just swam 1.3 miles in an hour. My swim stroke and speed have both really improved and my confidence in the water has increased tenfold.

My point is, even if I don't finish IronMan, I have succeeded. Even if I only finish the first loop of the swim, that's 1.2 miles father than I could ever swim before I got this crazy dream in my head. Even if I only finish up to the bike and can't do the run, that's still 70 miles farther than I'd ever gone prior to training.

Training has taught me I am strong, mentally and physically. It's taught me that I am capable. My body has done things I never thought someone like me would be capable of.

I might be a DNF, but a DNF is better than a DNS any day and you bet your bottom dollar I'm going to start and give it my all.

Even if I don't finish IronMan, I'm a winner.